Shot heard ‘round the village…

I gave our neighbors a start this morning, and I blame my dad’s secretaries for it. (Yes, I mean yous.)
First, you should know that everyone is a bit on edge because Abuba and her kids recently “escaped” to her mom’s house, on account of her husband’s brother wanting to kill them all. I know, interesting, right? Something about her husband “consuming” all their father’s cows, a very bad deal ‘round these parts. I guess some big deal went down while we were at team day—the “best” things always happen in our absence—which spurred them to flee and, as Mary told me this morning, caused the whole village to fear and the children to cry. So that’s on their minds. (And, obviously, mine, since Abuba & Co. are pretty dear to us.)
Second, you should know that the ladies at work gave my dad a wee can of bug spray for his trip out here, which he graciously left to my use when he went home. I’ve since used it up, and somehow the can slipped into the trash this morning as I went out to burn it.
So, there I am, happily and innocently burning the trash in our front yard, when the wee can EXPLODES and goes shooting up into the sky, then clatters back down to the rocks.
Everyone—and I mean everyone—stops what they’re doing. I hear the village come to the consensus that it came from the house of the whities. I’m left to stand there, holding my fire stick and wide-eyed in my guilt, trying to look as apologetic as possible. Next thing I know, Mary’s hollerin’ at me, wondering what in the world I was doing and if I had somehow acquired a gun—which, apparently, was what all the men looking down at me from the mangot were also wondering. I told her it was only a can, and she laughingly scolded me and told me everyone thought Abuba & Co. had come back and the brother had shot them.
I gave an apologetic wave up to the village—it’s weird, knowing everyone is always looking at you, but it’s worse, knowing this time they’re looking at you with good reason—and slinked into the house as soon as possible.
I had to bear the story about four hundred more times, as Mary took tea in my kitchen and told every passing person. Ibeja is so silly. Ibeja is always causing mischief. Oh, that ridiculous, white Ibeja. And I’m sure it’s being convey through the mountainside—the those-stupid-whitefolk stories are golden ‘round here and never seem to die away completely.
Why is it that this place always rings with gunshots—they’re so common, even we don’t jump at them anymore—but the morning I blow up a can, apparently everyone is at rapt attention?
Haha. Ugh.
(And, ladies, I hope you feel the weight of your guilt… or at least some of my embarrassment…)